I was torturing myself with my own thoughts! And the only person who could help me was me. Instead, I was worrying about the way I was living each day, the way I was thinking with a “victim” mentality. Suddenly I found myself not worrying about the fact that the relationship had ended. My mind was a hurricane of all the wrong thoughts. Hours later I always found myself thinking all those things I shouldn’t be thinking again. Talking about it to my friends only helped momentarily. It feels like even though you try to move on, to stop remembering, to stop speculating and thinking about this person, you make no progress.Įven though I never felt guilty about the end of the relationship (I am certain I did everything I could to save it and I was not going to torture myself), I did feel sad that he was with someone else, and I was still thinking about him and how great we once were. ![]() If you’ve also had to accept that someone you once loved doesn’t want to be with you anymore, you probably understand the rush of feelings and thoughts that come to you every day, every hour, every minute. I was left with a big hole in my heart and a turbulent, uncontrollable mind. I was still waiting for that second chance. I was still waiting for him because I had hope. Three weeks went by, and one day a friend of mine told me he had a girlfriend. I told him he should figure out what he wanted before hurting someone. I thought he came to me because he knew that he wanted to be with me, but he didn’t. But then he told me he was too scared to fully commit to me and that he wasn’t sure what he wanted. He told me he couldn’t stop thinking about me, that he compared every woman with me, and that he wanted to give us a second chance. He told me that he missed me terribly and wanted to see me. Two months passed, and one night he called me. ![]() I accepted his decision and started moving on with my life. He told me he couldn’t trust me anymore and couldn’t risk getting hurt again. ![]() I knew it was my fault we were in this mess, and he was suffering from my wrongdoing (which didn’t involve infidelity).Īfter a month we saw each other again, and he told me that he could not forgive me for what I did-that my mistake meant that I didn’t love him and had never loved him throughout our three years together. I accepted the consequences of my error and decided not to pressure him. Six months ago my ex-boyfriend decided to end our relationship because he couldn’t forgive me for a mistake I’d made.ĭuring the first weeks of our breakup I decided that it would be best if I just gave him some time to think things out. The tough part is actually dealing with suffering, accepting, letting go, moving on, and processing a whole lot of other feelings at the same time. “Why worry about things you can’t control when you can keep yourself busy controlling the things that depend on you?” ~Unknown
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